A Little Fun On The Way HomePosted by Phil Ferguson on January 29th, 2012 – 2 Comments – Posted in Personal Stories
As you may know I spent Saturday at Skepticamp Chicago. Then the family and I spent the night visiting with my Mom.
Earlier today I was driving home and stopped in the middle of nowhere to get some gas. I walked up the counter to pay and witnessed this exchange (not exact quotes… but you will get the idea….)
Clerk (20 year old woman)…. (to customer 1) Here is your pack of cigarettes and $.36 in change.
Customer 1 (50 year old man)…. I asked for 2. I gave you an extra $5.
I guess a pack of cigarettes cost about $5? – Damn!
Clerk… no… you only paid for one.
Customer 1… I gave you $20 for the gas then 5 ones and after you rang it up I gave you $5 more. You need to give me another pack or give me back my $5.
Clerk…. I don’t think you did, you only gave me $25.
Customer 1… ARE YOU CALLING ME A FUCKING LIAR?
I was standing directly behind customer 1 but I got there a little late on his payment so I don’t know if he gave her money twice or only once. However, I did spend several years in retail and this did sound like a possible “till Tap” scheme.
Clerk (handing a piece of paper and pen) Put you name and phone number on this and the manager will check the security tape and send you $5 if I am wrong.
Customer 1… I don’t live near here – this is fucking bull shit just give me back the $5.
Clerk… I can’t – I’m not sure if you gave me $5 dollars.
At this point the customer lets loose a string of profanity and something about never coming back. (I thought he was from out of town?) I did not know what to do but this guy seemed way out of control.
Me….(trying to muster my deepest, manly, man voice) Ma’am! Do you need some help?
Customer 1… (turning around to face me) Do you have a problem?
Me… Yes, where I come from a fine gentleman such as yourself would never swear things like “fuck you” to a lady.
Customer 1…. So! What are you going to do about it.
Awww. Shit… I was kinda hoping he would notice how loud he was and change his behavior. Luckily, at this very moment 2 other men walked up and stood next to me. They were not his friends – whew… They just heard this guy yelling and came over to see if they could help.
Me… I guess that is up to you – friend. (I know – Brilliant!)
Customer 1 looks at the three of us and turns back around and puts his name and phone number on the piece of paper. He then slowly turns and looks me right in the eye.
Customer 1… Next time – Mind your own fucking business!
Me… Yes sir! (sarcastically)
Just a second later I thought of this…. “When a gentleman swears at a lady it IS my business.” It was probably best that I kept it simple. Customer 1 walked out of the store. The other customers and I laughed about this nutter and the clerk broke down and started crying. We all told her that she did nothing wrong and he was just doing her job.